Micheal Hayden: “Possibility of North Korean Nuclear Attack Somewhere Between Remote and Zero” – David Cameron: “North Korean Nukes Can Hit the UK”

Jong Eun is shown “signing off” on a nuclear pre-emptive first strike on US mainland in propaganda photos published mostly for the benefit of his own people and to bolster his standing as a leader.

South Korea reported late last night that North Korea has begun moving missiles toward their east coast. Our US base in Guam is on it’s highest alert, and the world is watching, wondering just how far Kim Jong Eun will step toward the edge of all reason to peer over the edge into the abyss which would spell the end of his life, and the end of his nation.

I would bet that every American [ like me ] who lives on the west coast is also glued to news developments about North Korea 24-7. Even though we are all re-assured daily that Jon Eun will not and actually cannot technically make good on his threats, this situation feels awful and I really am furious about it.

Cited: Former CIA Director Michael Hayden told LIGNET this week that the possibility of North Korea launching a nuclear attack is “somewhere between extremely remote and zero,” but that he believes the current situation with the North is extremely dangerous and is becoming more so by the year. The cycle of threats by North Korea followed by promises of aid must be broken, he said.

See http://www.lignet.com/ArticleAnalysis/Hayden–Policy-of-Tremendous-Restraint-Has-North–?promo_code=125BD-1&utm_source=125BDTelegraph_Media_Group&utm_medium=nmwidget&utm_campaign=widgetphase1

Adding to all this conflicting information, Great Britain’s Prime Minister David Cameron has come out with a statement claiming it’s a “known fact” that North Korea has the technology to strike the UK with a nuclear missile.

So if this is a “known fact” then why are US military analysts telling the American public that North Korea does not have the technological ability to actually make good on their [ now daily] threats?  Which statements are true? I happen to think that is a question of urgent concern at this moment.

Forgive my French, but WTF?

Cited from the Telegraph.co.uk news website on 04.04.2013:

“The Prime Minister said he was “very concerned” about the threat from North Korea and warned that Pyongyang now has capabilities to strike the United States and Britain.

Speaking to workers in Scotland, the Prime Minister said the threat from North Korea showed that Britain needs to keep the Trident nuclear deterrent.

Asked if he was concerned about North Korea the Prime Minister said: “How concerned am I about North Korea? Very concerned, it has extremely dangerous technologies in terms of nuclear and its weapons.”

Hayden: Situation With North Korea ‘On the Edge’

Cameron: ‘fact’ that North Korea has ‘technology’ for nuclear strike against the UK

US base on standby as North Korea moves missile to the coast

North Korea’s missile launchers on the move, indicating possible new provocation

North Korea’s Twitter and Flickr accounts hacked by Anonymous

Anonymous Hackers Acquire 15,000 User Records from North Korean Site ‘Uriminzokkiri’ in Recent Hack

UN chief says North Korea crisis ‘really alarming’

North Korea Escalates Tensions By Declaring Intent to Restart Nuclear Weapons Production

“Nuclear threats are not a game,” Mr. Ban said at a news conference in Andorra. “The current crisis has already gone too far.” – U.N. Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon

Kim Jong Eun is apparently now ‘giving the finger’ to the US and the rest of the world. While the US and South Korea continue to hold a stern line [ the US sent a nuclear warship into international waters to watch for any attempted missile launch by the north over the past few days ] Jong Eun continues to do and say ALL THE WRONG THINGS TO KEEP THE PEACE, escalating tensions most recently by announcing on 04.02.2013 that North Korea will soon revive all of it’s shuttered nuclear reactors and begin processing plutonium again for the purposes of expanding it’s nuclear arsenal.

Cited:  “The United Nations secretary general, Ban Ki-moon, said Tuesday that North Korea appeared to be “on a collision course with the international community,” The Associated Press reported. Speaking in Andorra, where he is on an official visit, Mr. Ban said the crisis had gone too far and international negotiations were urgently needed.”

Upping the Ante with the International Community: Photo of one of North Korea’s dilapidated nuclear reactors.

Complicating any efforts to monitor this latest development is the fact that a small scale plutonium enrichment plant [ about 600 square meters in size ] could actually be built and operated literally underground in one of North Korea’s more than 8,000 tunnels which criss-cross the nation. Should North Korea choose this route any aerial surveillance of the plant would be impossible, of course. North Korea’s underground tunnel system is elaborate. Much of it is decades old and is believed to be for both military use and for civil defense purposes. I have included some photos of the North Korean tunnel systems. In 1974 it was discovered the North Korea was tunneling under the DMZ into South Korea.

Cited: North Korea is rich in uranium ores. Unlike the plutonium program, which included a large and easily spotted nuclear reactor, an enrichment plant composed of 1,000 centrifuges occupies a 600-square-meter space, small enough to be hidden in one of the estimated 8,000 tunnels North Korea has dug for military purposes across its mountainous terrain, South Korean military officials said.”

Cited:

“On November 15, 1974 while in operation in the western DMZ near Korangpo, allied reconnaissance troops found steam rising from the earth’s surface indicating that a tunnel was present underneath the DMZ. The tunnels depth is believed to be some 45 meters, has a total length of 3,500 meters of which 1,000 meters invaded into the DMZ. The tunnel is along a course that would have exiting soldiers heading towards Korango, Uijongbu and is some 65 km from Seoul, 8 km northeast of Korangpo. It has a prefabricated wall of concrete and slate. When discovered, there were 220-volt and 60-watt lamps, electric lines, railways, and track vehicles. The ground is inclined by 5 degrees to the north to prevent water from gathering. There are turning points on the railroad. The tunnel is large enough to allow the transit of a regiment of troops and heavy artillery every hour.

On March 19, 1975 a second tunnel was discovered following the testimony of Kim Bu-sung, former official of the Liaison Bureau of the Workers’ Party of North Korea, who participated in the construction of underground tunnels and defected to the South in 1974. The South Korean Army analyzed the sound of underground explosions which started to be heard in Cholwon in 1972, and examined suspected sites. The arch-shaped tunnel is double the size of the 1st Underground Tunnel. There is a plaza where troops gather, and three exits which were to be used for both conventional and unconventional warfare. The tunnel is located some 13 km north of Cholwon and is 101 km from Seoul. It has a total length of 3,500 meters and is 50-160 meter below the surface. About 3,000 armed troops and their vehicles, artillery and tanks can pass per hour.”

See http://www.globalsecurity.org/military/world/dprk/kpa-tunnels.htm

North Korean Infiltration Tunnels Under the DMZ

https://i1.wp.com/www.f-106deltadart.com/Korea-DMZ/photos/tunnels/oct03_dmz_tunnel3-2.jpg

See also North Korea Constructs “Underground Runway”

Illustration of a Third 1978 Underground Tunnel Built by North Korea into South Korea

Cited:

The 3rd infiltration Tunnel

“A North Korean defector told the South Koreans that tunnels were being constructed to allow N. Korean troops to invade S. Korea. After four years of searching, this large tunnel – the 3rd – was discovered. To find the tunnel the S. Koreans sunk many water pipes into the ground, filled them with water and waited. When dynamite exploded near a water pipe, the vibrations caused the water to spill from the nearest pipe alerting the S. Koreans to underground activity. North Korea claimed the tunnel was a coal mine and even painted the walls with coal dust but the tunnel was closed. We were able to take a long underground walk to visit the end of the tunnel but no cameras were allowed.

From Wikipedia: “The third tunnel was discovered on October 17, 1978. Unlike the previous two, the third tunnel was discovered following a tip from a North Korean defector. This tunnel is about 1,600 m (1,700 yd) long and about 350 m (1,150 ft) below ground. Foreign visitors touring the South Korean DMZ may view inside this tunnel using a sloped access shaft.”

North Korea Nuclear Test Information from 2010

http://www.flickr.com/photos/30554196@N06/7486393686/

How the West Sees Kim Jong Eun… Or … Just Because I Can [ and They’re Really Funny. ]

Humor has universal appeal for disarming misunderstanding between friends. How often have you seen someone crack a joke during a tense or uncomfortable moment and quickly clear the air, offering relief for everyone and lowering blood pressures all around? It works!

Let’s all crack some ‘North Korea’ jokes today. Can we lighten things up a bit? I live on the west coast and all the missile talk is getting old.

I am looking at hundreds of political cartoons and satirical images of Kim Jong Eun, JUST FOR FUN and to bring levity to the increasingly ridiculous situation that Eun finds himself in. If he will STOP making bellicose threats, then he won’t have to look cowardly or silly when he obviously knows he is NOT going to act on them.

One doesn’t shoot the only cook in the building when one is in prison and starving to death, right?

The prison that the Kim family dynasty built over 40 years, which Kim Jong Eun now finds himself inhabiting 24-7 is the domain of DIRE misunderstanding and misinterpretation of the greater world around North Korea. A lie of such magnitude that it’s almost hard to behold has been perpetrated in North Korea for decades now. The BIG LIE is the ongoing tall tale that America is the “sworn enemy” of the North Korean people. We Americans well know that nothing could be further from the truth. Our tax dollars have helped to feed the North Korean people for at least twenty years now. Fact check it if you don’t believe me.

So why does North Korean leadership want to bite the hand that feeds it?

There is one singular answer. As long as Kim Jong Eun can keep the “big lie” going and continue to cow his people with the tall tale that America is their “sworn enemy” who intends to harm or erase the North Korean people off the earth, the sickening military machine of North Korean fascism can continue to grind on, like the ever-present gnawing in the bellies of 24 million people, 3 million of whom have already starved to death due to the policies of the Kim family dynasty.

3 million people: that’s the entire population of the greater Seattle or Portland region. It’s a stomach turning fact. And it’s only an estimate. No one really knows exactly how many North Koreans have already died from starvation, or have been killed in the despised secret prison gulags since the rise of the Kim family dynasty of death and despair.

Where is the personal breaking point of the North Korean people?

I have to wonder: how many North Koreans long for freedom and “3 squares a day?” How many North Koreans would be delighted with even “one square meal” today?

How many North Koreans feel they have the literal strength and inner resolve to rise up and call for a change? Is there a boiling point brewing anywhere inside the secretive nation? Is there a real hunger for freedom, more than just REAL and ONGOING hunger?  I wonder about these things, and today I am posting a little good humor to bring levity to the moment and comic relief to an insane and truly tragic situation.

See also https://21stcenturyscreenshots.wordpress.com/2013/03/26/north-korea-new-threats-usa/

See also http://www.nknews.org/2013/03/what-its-like-to-run-a-north-korea-news-website/

See also http://www.nknews.org/2013/03/combat-ready-north-korea-threatens-to-attack-u-s-bases/

North Korea Issues Highest Military Alert, Makes New Threats Against USA

North Korean ruler Kim Jong Eun seems to live in his own ‘private military Idaho’. It’s well known all around the world that the US military has no interest or intention of initiating any sort of military “first strike” against the miniscule fascist state, but by the way Eun is frantically beating his chest and bellowing one would think the man feels threatened.

The fact is Kim Jon Eun DOES feel threatened. US joint military exercises now underway with South Korea have rattled the little fat man’s nerves enough that he continues to issue loud bellicose and irrational threats, making statements like the following:

“From this moment the… supreme command will put on the highest alert all the field artillery units including strategic rocket units and long-range artillery units which are assigned to strike bases of the U.S. imperialist aggressor troops in the U.S. mainland and on Hawaii and Guam and other operational zone in the Pacific as well as all the enemy targets in south Korea and its vicinity.” – Kim Jong Eun

This commentary kind of reminds me of the wild crazy unstable neighbor who threatens passersby on the shared sidewalk with an ax every time their dogs pee on his lawn. Everyone knows the crazy ax man neighbor has a screw loose, and probably needs MEDS at least. Most make an effort to avoid letting their dogs step on his grass, but once in a while a stray pooch does the unthinkable and pees on the man’s grass, which unleashes a pathological rage riot by the guy, brandishing his

“Infant Terrible” Kim Jong Eun: At only 28 years of age, Kim Jong Eun had little life experience or knowledge of the actual outside world when he inherited the Kim family dynasty’s highest postiion of power. His behavior since he took the helm of North Korea has only confirmed suspicions that he is remarkably unprepared to lead the Korean people, behaving in many ways as a permanently developmentally frozen man-child himself. Western cartoonists have not hesitated to play upon this fact in their portrayals of the youthful and apparently clueless Kim Jong Eun.

weapon on his front lawn and roaring at the passerby who scuttles away with the guilty looking dog. Kim Jong Eun  is  “the crazy guy in the neighborhood” which everyone tries to avoid – he definitely has the syndrome. What the US and South Korea can’t avoid is also being on joint military high alert in case “the crazy guy in the neighborhood” actually does lose it and come running at them with his ax.

The joint military exercises we are conducting with South Korea equates to our dogs peeing on Kim Jong Eun’s lawn. We have to use that shared sidewalk to conduct the exercises. And Eun is bellowing about it, waving his ax in the air.

A propaganda poster displayed in North Korea crushing the
American military under the weight of a nuclear missile.
The majority of North Koreans have little or no idea that
Westerners bear no malice toward them personally. Rather,
we are moved with compassion due to their ongoing plight.
Our government and the UN have issued the sternest sanctions
yet regarding North Korea’s pursuit of nuclear weapons,
as of March 2013.

I suppose any signs that could be interpreted as a DE-escalation would just be the sounds of silence, huh? They would be the sounds of Eun NOT making a fresh new bellicose threat against South Korea and the US.

Is there anyone in Kim Jong Eun’s inner circle who knows how to give this man a chill pill?  It’s time.  I’m all for the sound of silence from Kim Jong Eun.

If the big hint about the “sound of silence” doesn’t work – maybe we can all send flowers?  Here is my gift of beauty, peace and serenity to Kim Jong Eun, courtesy of the Miracle Corporation blog on WP:

See also http://worldnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2013/03/26/17467525-north-korea-puts-rocket-units-on-highest-alert-issues-new-threats-against-us?lite&google_editors_picks=true

See also:

‘Combat Ready’ North Korea Threatens To Attack U.S. Bases

Flickr Photo Gallery of North Korean Travel Photos

Pentagon: North Korean Missiles Can Reach US Mainland, US To Boost West Coast Missile Defences

MY RANT, MY REACH AND MY ROLE, NOW EXERCISED.

Warning: The reader will continuously be exposed to the word “fat” in this essay. Further, the reader will repeatedly see the phrase “little fat man” and little fat boy” in this essay. There is one person in the entirety of North Korea at this time, who has been photographed, and who would be considered either “a man of girth” [ which is the eloquent way of stating it ] or who would be considered “fat.” And that man is Kim Jong Eun. I have spent the last two weeks looking and hundreds if not thousands of photos of the people of North Korea. I have not seen EVEN ONE photo of an overweight person among the population. Why? one supposes. Why do you think? Kim Jong Eun does not eat three times a day. He FEASTS at least five times a day on the most expensive food stuffs imaginable while his people drop dead of starvation as they struggle to stay upright without wobbling in any given moment.  Even if the North Korean people had the raw courage and inner resolve to form a bloodless COUP and drop this man dead in his tracks without firing a single shot [ yes, there are more than one thousand and one ways to do this ] I highly doubt that they would have the physical strength to pull off the feat. I am making it abundantly clear in this essay how thoroughly I despise this ridiculous little man and everything he represents. Not to mention that Dennis Rodman is now forever on my shit-list as well. I have had enough of being threatened by teeny-weeny comic book characters posing as the rulers of nations. If you are a North Korean living in the free world, I hope you will find a way to get this essay into the hands of the right people who are living in North Korea. Somehow, some way they need to bring this man to his end, and quickly, before the US military does it for them. It’s easier to put one deranged fool out of his misery than to take more than half of his nation with him as nuclear collateral damage, don’t you think?  That’s why I am writing this essay. Better the one man die NOW than 15 or 16 million of his own people soon die with him because they were too scared to rise up and do something to stop him before it was too late.

~~~@@&@@~~~

It’s another crazy day in the life of an American news blogger. I wake up and before I am half way through my first cup of tea I see two headlines which call up my warrior blood, in spite of trying to ignore them:

Pentagon: North Korean Missiles Can Reach The United States

US to boost nuclear missile defences to counter North Korea

That’s not a combination of headlines I want to see, and definitely not a combination of headlines I really want to write about. So I wasted a good half hour blogging about a 33 million dollar casino heist in Australia, and a notorious 25 cent vending machine which is now famous here in the states. But the news out of North Korea constantly nags at me, and I have focused alot of attention on the problematic and starving country in recent weeks.

What I DID NOT want to EVER hear from the Pentagon is a statement confirming that North Korean missiles can hit the US west coast, which is my beloved home [ my home by birth, not by crawling under a fence and running through the desert to get here ] my cherished point of origin for all my daily endeavors, both in life and on the internet.  It makes me quietly livid to know that a crazy, petulant, indulged little fat boy in North Korea, whose entire life experience could most likely be placed inside of an Asian tea cup, has the technological wherewithal along with the sheer insanity to believe he can nuke me and the country I was born in, the same country who has helped to feed his starving people for more than two decades now.

How the hell did the world get this crazy and out of control?  How has it come to be that madmen, little fat men, big fat boys and abjectly crazy lunatic deranged men can routinely climb to the helm of a nation? Or just by the twisted “luck of the cosmic draw” be born into situations where they literally inherit an entire nation of thin, weak starving good and earnest people who deserve so much better than what they have been given and are already cowered into submission by those in the family who came before?

What sickening fluke of karmic fate has it that a woman like me is pressed to write an irate essay about such a pathetic and inherently tragic and narcissistic individual like little fat boy Kim Jong Eun?

With all the possibilities of the world at his feet, born into posh luxury, opulent material decadence, and just about total military power, all this man can think of to do with what he has been given is to continue hurting, torturing, and starving his own people while simultaneously threatening to NUKE the hand that feeds him. How tragic and truly sickening is this situation? How strange has this world become that healthy creative positive living, goodness and normalcy is continuously threatened by clinically questionable, most likely pathological little fat men from foreign lands who make the scripts of all 007 movies potentially come true with their pathetic threats to continuously “nuke the world” since they will never EVER fit into it, even if they try for decades on end?

All the visits in the known universe from Dennis Rodman will NEVER ever make Kim Jong Eun a normal man, capable of normal male instincts to lead, guide, govern and care for his people in a benevolent and loving, intelligent manner. Born into the same kind of clinical pathology which formed Hitler, and cultivated from a cadre of terrified military “yes” men who tremble to offend the little fat boy [ lest he run over them too with tanks] Jong Eun is destined to live an isolated, rather sickening life and will come to a quick and quite isolated “rather sickening end” himself one day.

The minute the little fat boy makes the most foolish decision in modern history is the minute he and his country will cease to exist. “These are the facts of the case  – and they are not in dispute“, quote a famous movie scene.

I happen to believe that our nation has no intention of standing idly by as Jong Eun shakes his little fat belly and rattles his tiny sabres, hoping that in so doing he might raise his position in the world from ZERO to possibly ONE.

There are one-thousand-and-one wonderful things which Jong Eun could have done with the opportunity which was given to him by the universe, in having him be born into one of the most despicable ruling family dynasties in Asia, if not the world.

A brighter, more creative and intellectually inspired man would have had the inner spiritual wherewithal to actually reform socialism in his country, giving people more opportunities to work, learn, earn and provide better for their own families rather than being forced to EAT THEIR OWN CHILDREN in final starving desperation.

A better man would have set himself immediately to the task of dismantling North Korea’s NOT so secret network of gulags, allowing people to return to their families to raise their children and mend ravaged relations.

A superior man would have rolled up his sleeves immediately after ascending to the highest position in the land and reached out to the all the brightest and the best in every nation that he claims has “sent gifts of friendship” to look for innovative trade and economic solutions to North Korea’s dying internal Detroit-like generational fiscal decay.

But Kim Jong Eun is not that kind of man and he never will be. His inspired “opening moments” of leadership at the helm of his Asian fiefdom is to threaten to nuke the greatest nation on earth within about a year of inheriting his little kingdom. Epic Fail is not a term that even begins to describe how pathetic and tragic his reign is in it’s genesis.

Little man Kim Jong Eun:  May your rule be brief. May your legacy of sheer madness, idiocy and genetically inherited evil doom you to a fleeting and completely unimportant moment in human history, which won’t last long enough for historians to even bother to discuss. May you fail to even become a footnote in the passing of events in time and space as the rising tide of Man’s goodness swallows his fading lesser more wicked self in the next 100 years. May you evaporate as quickly as you have imagined that you might cause others to evaporate in order  to bolster your own dim sense of actual selfhood.

May your fantasy of who you are grind point to point very soon with the stark actuality of what you can and cannot do in the real world of nations, and hope get away with it. May your end come quickly. May you then be utterly erased and forgotten in God’s universe.

North Korea missile ranges map

China Ponders It’s Relations with North Korea: Keep or Dump? Fight or Talk?

This post is decidedly culled from online “rumor mill” material, but at least one credible source cited below offers a peek into a recent meeting of government officials in China where it was debated whether China should “keep or dump” North Korea. Also considered was whether the giant benefactor should “fight or talk” with North Korea.

Cited: “As another colleague, Jane Perlez, reports, while the Chinese government is not changing its position in public, there are signs that an increasingly substantial debate is under way here, not just among officials but also more broadly among analysts, on the wisdom of continued support.

As Jane reports, a senior Communist Party official, Qiu Yuanping, described a spirited debate last week at the Chinese Political People’s Consultative Conference in Beijing over whether China should “keep or dump” North Korea and whether China, as a major power, should “fight or talk” with the North.”

This comes as Amnesty International reports new evidence that North Korea is not only expanding it’s dreaded public work camp system, a vast network of remote gulags where dissenters and their families are sent to slowly starve to death while working from dawn to dusk and being beaten bloody over trifles. More ominous, there are now new reports that indicate North Korea is integrating parts of their gulag prison camp system into the civilian population, such that it’s difficult to understand where the camps end and so-called “normal life” begins. In the West we call activities like this “PSY OPs.” I’m quite sure that in North Korea this is being done to intimidate and cower the remaining civilian population which lives outside the camps. It is believed that at least 200,000 North Koreans exist inside their dire prison gulags, living in abject misery. The magnitude of the human rights abuses which have taken place in North Korea over the past 20 years is difficult to even fathom. Those who escape and live to tell the tale have astounded and appalled the world with their stories of what life is like inside the small, failing regime.

A UN investigation into the human rights abuses perpetrated by North Korean dynasty onto it’s own population is so far overdue at this point that it cannot happen fast enough. It is an open shame lying on the shoulders of the free world that such an investigation has not happened sooner. By all means proceed while they are yet lives that can be saved. When we fail to treasure human life everywhere on earth we are on our way to losing our fundamental humanity. And we certainly have the dismal and disgusting sight right in front of us of what happens when a group of human beings imprisons their own population into a fascist state controlled system where the many suffer in extreme pain for the wealth and benefit of the few. There is NOTHING in the government of North Korea which can be lauded or admired, and everything in it which disgusts the soul and calls out for justice and the liberation of a population being held prisoner to the darkest version of socialism practiced anywhere on earth in modern times, even generationally.  Investigate North Korean human rights abuses by all means, and do it quickly.

One wonders if the last and most desperate act of the leaders of this tiny misguided nation will be an all-out effort to control their entire population by enslaving civilians and attempting to control and monitor their every move. It would appear that the beginnings of such efforts may possibly be underway.

One of the first things people ask me when I describe to them the present conditions in North Korea is:

“Why don’t the North Korean people rise up?”

It’s not easy to answer that question, and I can only speculate that the civilian population of North Korea has been so mind numbingly brainwashed by the constant onslaught of news about what happens to dissenters in those camps, that they are possibly literally terrified into submission.  Successor Kim Jong Eun had 31 of his own top brass killed right after he took office to make the point that dissent = instant death at the top levels of North Korean leadership. He even had one of his high military officials run over by a tank while the others watched, just to make a point. [ I wonder if NBA clown Dennis Rodman knew about this when he buddied up to the little monster a week ago? ]

Cited:  “According to new satellite imagery commissioned by Amnesty, the North Korean government is “blurring the lines between its political prison camps and the surrounding population,” raising fears that it is spreading the camps into the general population.

Up to 200,000 people are believed to live in the camps and conditions are “extremely harrowing,” according to U.N. investigations.”

Conditions in North Korea: Video Reports

Don’t Nuke Us, Kim Jong Eun. If You Do, You Might Hurt Our NBA Basketball Stars.

English: Chicago Bulls Dennis Rodman 1995 - 19...

English: Chicago Bulls Dennis Rodman 1995 – 1996 Season (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Politics and the search for world peace [ not to be confused with whirled peas ] makes for strange bed fellows. For better or worse, sometimes the most unlikely public personage can make an inroad toward better foreign relations where the officially designated team cannot. No slur is intended for our small army of US high officials who handle Asian foreign relations, but today [ for the first time EVER in my life] I am supremely grateful for the personality dazzle and star power of none other than rainbow flame Dennis Rodman, former NBA superstar and now, Kim Jong Eun‘s new BFF.

North Korea has been doing and saying all the wrong things to keep the waters calm for US / Asia foreign relations in recent months. Every public statement and action from the tiny starved nation has escalated the bluster and threat vibe. It hasn’t felt real pleasant to have to watch recent North Korean propaganda videos where imagined nuclear bombs detonate in large US cities, all playing out to the strains of Michael Jackson’s “We Are the World” elevator music.

The radical Muslims want us dead from the East, and North Korea wants to nuke us into oblivion from the West. It’s not at all a placid time in America’s history, and our politicians are so interested in wagering for their own political survival on both sides, they seem to have forgotten that there is a nation to run of American people, and that the mighty task of running it requires rising to a higher plane  than merely jousting for DNC or GOP interests.

Meanwhile, back at the North Korean ranch, nuclear test rockets are fired, the ground is shaking, troops are high stepping in well groomed rows of porcelain military perfection with their heads all turned toward youngster-in-charge Kim Jong Eun, and I am wondering, as I always do, how many other Americans are watching it all unfold as closely as I am.

Enter Dennis Rodman, the most unlikely but well suited goodwill ambassador for North Korea we could have ever NEVER imagined. The only two people who could have been more perfect for this job might have been Elvis Presley or Marilyn Monroe, both of whom were adored and practically worshiped by Kim’s father.  Will wonders never cease in the modern world?

We could always choose to settle our disputes by having two representatives, one from each nation, run a foot race then appoint the winner as the final philosophical and moral victor. But if we chose Rodman and Eun to run the race, no contest. Rodman would win and the US would be the victor. All military swash-buckling could then come to an official end. It makes just as much sense to me as how we handle our foreign relations by proxy celebrity, food bribes, cash payments and official double-speak.

Cited:


Kim Jong Eun and former NBA star Dennis Rodman watch an exhibition basketball game in Pyongyang, North Korea on Thursday. (Jason Mojica/AP)

“You have a friend for life.”

Dennis Rodman to Kim Jong Eun after the two watched an exhibition basketball game together in Pyongyang Thursday, according to an organizer of the NBA legend’s improbable North Korean goodwill tour. No, really! A spokesman for VICE, the media company underwriting the trip, told AP that the young dictator also hosted the American delegation for a long, boozy dinner, just two weeks after conducting an underground nuclear test that has heightened tensions with the U.S. The WorldViews blog ponders what this all means.

More Reliable Source: Arnold Schwarzenegger; Ted Kennedy house; Rachel McAdams; Michelle Obama’s bangs

By  |  11:56 AM ET, 02/28/2013